


When I see you, are you seeing me too?

by flxss



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: Crushes, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Secrets, Silence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:21:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27125137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flxss/pseuds/flxss
Summary: Richard sits at his desk unable to concentrate with a Jared shaped distraction in front of him, who doesn't seem to be having the same problem.
Relationships: Jared Dunn/Richard Hendricks
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	When I see you, are you seeing me too?

**Author's Note:**

> In the POV of Richard!  
> I wanted to write something that's a bit more... deep? I don't know how to say it without being completely ridiculous, but I really wanted to try something different to things I've written so far and I hope it comes across in this very short piece <3

I could sit all day and not notice it. Or at least pretend not to notice it. As you sit across from me, typing away in your curiously one-two, one-two pattern. I look forward, not up. Certainly not up. Not up into your deep eyes that could lead directly to your soul, or mine, if looked into for too long. No, I look straight at my screen and focus. I type the same code over and over, some of it different, but all of it utterly the same. Why can’t I do it? Just last week I had finished the new section and now I only had to do this tiny, really minuscule part, before I could hand it over to Dinesh and be done with the task for the day. But instead I’m blankly zoning out on the same damn line. And here you are. Still are working in that same rhythm. Click, click. Click, click. 

It’s your foot across from mine that nudges first. No, it’s mine or maybe both at the same time. The front of your shoe grazes mine and I can feel my heart still. Now, I am not typing anything. Not even the filler I was pretending to fill time and space with. My heart doesn’t start again but until the familiar click-click of your keyboard, in time with my every beat. My eyes flicker to yours and- was that a smile? You bastard. It’s not sweet, it’s smug. You know. You can see it. You know and you like it. Fine.

I put my foot alongside yours now and start typing away again, the same old nonsense appearing on the screen. I do know what I should be doing, this is just more important right now. I sidle my other foot against your other foot and sit still. Hoping for a reaction. I can hear you breathing, but it is slower now. Deeper breath after deeper breath. Every exhale directed at me. That’s what you get. Then, after both our feet are touching ABAB- or RJRJ- you sigh in a finalized way. You look up at me. I can see where they lead. My fingers hovering over the keyboard, I raise my eyebrows as if to say ‘What?’. Your eyes certainly remind me ‘what’. Is it a face I’m seeing, or a projection? What if we speak and the fantasy is over? What do we do when our words don’t match our gaze?

We don’t have a moment to figure it out because Dinesh figures it out for us, slamming the door open and dragging along Gilfoyle with him. I didn’t even expect them to take so long, so I don’t know what I feel now. Disappointment? 

“Are you ready Richard?” Dinesh is staring at me from the end of the table, with his bag over his shoulder. 

I snap out from wherever (whomever) ever I’ve been, noticing that my foot is cold and alone. My hand smacks along my face, dragging in my cheek with weariness. I shake my head, screw my eyes up momentarily and look at them. 

“Uh yeah, give me five minutes.”


End file.
